to make my dreams come true...
I never would've made such an ambitious goal. In fact, I was perfectly happy living life as it was. I had a job, some relationships, some type of spirituality. I had issues, but for the most part, I was able to keep them at bay.
However, underneath it all, I was always on the verge of some breakdown. In fact, some sort of depression and ups and downs were common in my life. Until a deep depression set it. A kind that I couldn't just snap out of.
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I needed to come back to life.
I couldn't live in that depression any longer. It went on for years. And if I'm being honest, I've lived a sad life for way too long.
I've accomplished so much on the outside, but never true happiness on the inside. I wasn't happy from the inside out.
Thus my solution, I was inspired by God to do things I love! Literally! I had to rediscover my spirit. Who I was, what I loved. I had to rediscover that I deserved to be happy and full of life!
Do what you love.
I did some soul searching. For some reason it wasn't easy, but I eventually got on a roll of discovering what I like. Then I didn't deprive myself of any good thing. In my past, I was infamous for being so hard and stingy with myself.
New life
I applied for and got a job that's always energized me. I started serving at a restaurant again. And not just any restaurant. A Mexican restaurant because I LOVE Mexican food!
Then I started making friends. Real friends where I can be myself and they know and love me for me and I know and love them for them. This was a new thing for me.
I let myself enjoy my precious family. Instead of simply fulfilling family roles and responsibilities, I was intentional in bonding with them and enjoying them. Oh it's changed my home life! It's full of laughter, playfulness, and teamwork.
Once a week, I take myself out on a fun day! I realized this is essential for my unique personality. I wander. Go to a coffee shop. Maybe shop. I dream. Create. I let myself be free. This new habit has been pivotal in my battle against depression.
Lastly, I let myself do what I've always loved doing. What I would do if money didn't matter. That thing I would've regretted if I didn't do it in my lifetime...